So we have come to a point in the house where all the cabinets are assembled, the floors are laid down and the plumbing is set up — but we are putting the final touches on electricity and well hot water. Both are essential to moving into the little shack of horrors. I wanted to wait to post final final photos so you could see it finally.
I spent last night in search of a couch. First, a tale of couches. I had for years a comfy green sofa that was very easy to fall asleep watching television It showed it age, and had kids and dogs jumping on it so it was retired for an IKEA couch, which, I do love me some MDF and particle-board constructed cabinets and furniture, but anything that involve foam, well, the Swedes don’t hit the target in my opinion. The couch we did own, well, it did not support your neck, so you’d fall asleep with your neck hanging back over the edge. Very uncomfortable. And the dark blue color gave me hives. It was a particularly virulent shade of bluish navy. Gave one bad flashbacks to catholic school uniforms. But I digress from the situation at hand.. my search for a new couch….
I had the walls painted a nice silvery color to complement my black and white photography. I did not want either a beige or chocolate sofa. I was hoping for either black, gray or red. (You know you are a graphic designer when color becomes first priority). I decided to hit a very well known furniture store in Rhode Island. Oh god, oh god the horror.. Two hours later, I escaped the clutches of a high powered sale assistant named Susan. She tried to steer me towards every couch in there, even though I kept throwing out more and more bizarre yet strangely creative answers to the questions.
Reclining *Powered* (by what I wonder, a battery pack? I really don’t want to have to plug in a sofa in addition to my computers, TV and assorted lamps) Sofa: ”I don’t like the loss of control over my chair movements, plus, my dog would bark it.” I sounded like crazy level one.
Microfiber Sofa with Ottoman: It’s beige. I don’t like beige. Gives me strange thoughts. Crazy level two achieved.
Giant Sectional: “It’s a really small house. I have to have room for my three computers in the same room.” Crazy level three achieved. (This is true actually, and its not counting my iPad).
Small Leather Sofa: “My dog has really long talons.” I make clawing motions with my hand. She looks a little frightened, but Susan, bless her heart sticks with a potential sale.
Giant fluffy couch with cushion explosions: ”The pillows would shift about and drive me insane. Plus, you know, I’d spend all day rearranging them.” In the meantime, I spy a gorgeous turquoise leather chair and begin to stroke it. She then tries to sell me chairs, but I finally just take pity and tell her that I’ll be back, and walk out.
I discover at the next store telling them you left your cell phone in the car is a great idea. Finally, I make my way to Bob’s Discount Furniture, which I like the name I must say, even though the photo of a rendered 3D Bob is kinda creepy. And what CEO gets his photo taken in ratty sneakers? I suppose if he’s not making much money… but anyway, they have a clearance pit, which I wander in past the levels of cushion explosion beige and chocolate sofas, and see it. Charcoal gray, with a chaise lounge that my dog would approve of (and half off). They are discontinuing this line of perfectly beautiful, modern and plain lined sofa, and it was the floor model. The extra pillows are pretty awful, I suspect the designer may have had an off day in the world of fabric design, but that can be easily fixed.
Couch achieved. The best part? Someone else tried to buy it as I was swiping my card to purchase.
seriously, who designed the blue and beige zebra print pillows and why would you commit such a crime against the fabric arts?